Parenting Teenagers - Precautions For Teenagers Chatting Online

Parenting Teenagers has become a tough task for today's parents. If your teenager is one of those who loves chatting and making friends online, there are few things that you need to be careful about in these days of cyber crime. With hacking becoming a rampant problem, your children past chats can reveal a lot of your personal details. To ensure that your children do not fall into any such trap, ask your teenger to keep the following points in mind.

Never reveal your financial details: You could be chatting online about money matters, but ensure that you never reveal any money related details. Be it your account number or credit/debit card number, do not reveal these things over chat. Don’t add just about anyone to your chatlist: Do not add people to your chat list to have a long list of ‘friends’. Know the person a bit before adding him/her to your chat list.

Be careful when in chat rooms: Chat rooms are a good place to interact with people, but understand that there are strangers lurking, so be attentive about what you are saying.

Be polite, but not over-friendly: If someone pings you, it is alright to answer them or chat with them, but don’t get over-friendly. Do not promise to meet them or be their best buddy. If someone suggests that you should meet during the first chat, blocking that person is perhaps a good idea.

Don’t use profanities: While gossiping online is very much in, don’t use profanities when in a chat room. Saying nasty things about other people in cyberspace is called ‘flaming’. You can be barred if you say things that the moderator doesn’t approve of.

Watch what you say: Some organisations get experts to keep a tab on their employees chats. Maybe it is a good idea to not gossip about office politics over chat. Keep it for conversations over coffee with friends at some cafe.

No expectations:  The basic rule of chatting is that do not expect anything if you are chatting with a stranger. You don’t know the person on the other end, so don’t expect him/her to be funny, witty or sensitive. The conversation might lead to a friendship or it may just end after the first chat. Don not be hurt if someone does not want to be your friend and ignores you or blocks you. Be open minded about these things when you get ready to log on.

Source: TOI

Importance Of Teenager's Relationship With Parents

These days, teenagers want to be independent and try to drift away from their parents and other family members. They don't know the importance of maintaining relationship with parents.  As they grow they resent any interference of their elders and feel that the parents and their relatives are more of a hindrance than a help. As bachelors they want to be at a distance from parents to avoid their checks and prying eyes.

After marriage they want to live separately as a nuclear family for privacy,  for the "welfare" of their children. Unfortunately their spouses encourage and even pester them to stay away from the family for some reason or other.

Due to new job opportunities,single and married youths have to move away from parents. But even when staying away,cordial relationship with parents can be maintained by giving them the feeling that you care and are concerned about them by your visits, phone calls, letters, attending family functions and requesting them to visit you and welcoming them at your place. Just thinking about yourself, your spouse and children while ignoring  parents and other family members will cut you off from the family lifeline which is very important for emotional support and happiness.

For sons, daughters the ties with parents is a lifeline for various reasons. Parents and elders of the family are the greatest well-wishers of their children. If at any time they show their anger or do not agree with your views or do not support you on your decisions, do not take it to heart or become cross with them. You may not realise it  today but most of the time, time will prove that they were right. They may not be as educated as their sons and daughters are today but parents have long experience with them and have gone through the ups and downs of life.

They have come accross a variety of people of different nature who were very good, good, so-so, bad and very bad.  Their knowledge of human nature is unsurpassable.

You never know when you will be ditched by your lover or by your husband or wife or duped by your friends or happen to fall ill or get injured.  If have kept the family life line intact, rest assured that your parents and people will definitely come to your rescue, howsoever you may have hurt them by your attitude, arrogance and adamant behaviour in the past.

Parents today are no more as rigid as in the past and often quite amenable to adopting new views and act on them. If they still resist some action on their grown up children, it is either due to some compulsions of the community in which they are living are due to their foreseeting the likely harmful effect to their beloved children in the near and distant future.

Many youths think that they do not need anybody to help them.  They have good neighbours, friends and money which will see them through all adversities.  No doubt, neighbours, friends and colleagues are of great value and help as they are the closest, but at the same time you have to maintain good relationship with parents.

Money is a great mover and most of the requirements can be catered to with money.  But these do not fill the void created by distancing yourself from your parents and other family members.

Parenting Teenagers - Does Your Boy Or Girl Have Mood Swings?

Teenage is a complex period of transition and mood swings are normal.  Parenting teenagers is a difficult task. concerns about identity, free atmosphere of the college, sudden change in whole outlook, worries about appearance and friendship are just some of the things that grip teenagers. Add to this, the ebb and flow of harmones. All these factors result in an unpredictable mixture of moods; happy and outgoing one day, glum and depressing the next.

The teenage is the most turbulent stage of any one's life, this is the age when all the physical, hormonal and emotional changes take place and during this stageif he or she is not getting proper attention and guidance ot can lead to emotional imbalance and can have Mood swings.

Teenage is the most crucial age because at this age children are neither young nor adult. In this age they have many physical, psychological, emotional changes in their body which they are also not able to recognise and understand them resulting  mood swings which is a normal phenemena. At this age their behaviour pattern also changes.

Mood swings are defined as uncertainity between elation and degection. Extremes and predominate with the more moderate variations in between almost completely absent. Most researchers agree that it is a combination of biological and emotional factors that affect a teenager's mood.  There is another aspect to be looked into between 16 to 19 years of age when one can show the symptoms of mood swings (bi-polar disorder) if he has the genetic loading from his parents and grandparents of the same type of illness.  They need to be given proper attention and treatment if they require, after consultation from the psychologist/psychiatrist.

If your teenager or daughter starts having mood swings and stays out late, they it could very well be a sign that your daughter or son is in love. Swiss researchers  at the  Psychiatric university clinics found that teen sin the early stage intense romantic love were more prone to mood swings.  Parenting Teenager is a sensitive task and one should to know how to tackle it.

Parents Role:

First thing parents need to remember is that mood swings are part of the course with teens.  The challenge is to know when they need to be tolerant and when there is a real problem that needs attention Counsellor Harman Saini believes that parenting teenager in this condition is very important. He suggests,  "they should spend more time with their children, understand their anxiety with patience and wisdom, and need to have one to one dialogue with open mind without rejecting their ideas".

As adults, we need to set examples before the adolescents.  So it will not be wise to treat them with "tit for tat" policy.  Be like water and learn to flow with them.  Reinforce the right behaviour and refrain from commenting on the undesired behaviour.

The adolescent knows what is right and what is not.  They love to learn form experiment.  So give them freedom to discuss their experiences.  Remember that it is their temporary phase, so be wise in parenting teenagers.